*Erestor POV*

Through early morning fog I see
The visions of the things to be
The pains that are withheld from me
I realise and I can see

I have not seen Glorfindel since the binding. Bravely he had shown up, eyes a mask of indifferance to those who did not know him well. But not to me. I saw pure, raw anguish as he watched the one he loved be bound. His chin lifted with pride, jaw set with grim determination. He stood towards the back. Away from prying and curious eyes. I stood off to the side, where I could watch everyone in attendance. As the words to complete the binding were spoken, I was the only one to see the tear that slipped down his cheek. I was the only one to see the look of utter anguish in his eyes. The hurt, the pain. I was the only one who noticed him turn and run. 'Glorfindel.' Was the only thing softly muttered from my lips.

I felt a grim resolve settle over my features. I was angry. The announcement had come suddenly. Everyone had been shocked when Elrond made the announcement. Just yesterday. I was angry. He had not warned anyone, least of all Glorfindel. The binding had been in the planning for over a year, and yet he had kept it from the one he had claimed to love. Glorfindel had seemingly taken the news quite well. But, how could he not? The announcement was made in front of all. What did Elrond expect? For him to fall to his knees in suplication and beg? Not our Glorfindel. The Balrog-Slayer was too proud for that. He did me proud to watch him as he embraced Elrond in a hug and with a smile on his face, congratulated him. Even then though, even then I noticed his light dimming. I felt a sharp pain caress my chest.

I sneered into Elrond's face as he tried to draw me into conversation. A conversation I did not wish to have with him. The look of confusion and shock on his face almost made me bark with laughter. I turned my back on him and went to a dark corner. There to observe the reception given in honor of the Lord of Imladris and his new Lady Wife. I watched as Elrond made his way back to Celebrian. Watched as he drew her into his arms and kissed her. Deeply. Disgust rolled off of me in waves. Elrond must have felt it, for he turned and his eyes met mine. All I could do was sneer, watching as his eyes clouded in confusion before he turned away. Did he really not know what he has done?

As my eyes scanned the room of revelers, they alight on another dark corner. I see pain filled eyes staring at the Lord of Imladris. At his Lady Wife. Alluring azure, filled with hurt. 'Glorfindel.' Once again softly murmured from my lips. As if hearing me, Glorfindel looks to me. I once again see tears on his face, before he turns and runs once again. I wish to follow, but being Elrond's Chief Advisor, I am expected to stay. To help play host. My stomach is tied in knots thinking about Glorfindel. My fears for him turning the wine in my hand into a sour taste. The thought of the legendary Balrog-Slayer fading after having been given knew life, twisting in my gut. Nobody deserved such a fate, especially him. Once again, I feel a sharp pain caress me, making me gasp.

Suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
But I can take or leave it if I please

I can see that Elrond is growing angry with my actions. But I cannot help myself. What he has done to Glorfindel was appalling. He claimed to love him, showed his devotion in public. Everyone knew of their relationship and then the fateful ball was lowered. I watch as Elrond with angry eyes twinkling, makes his way towards me. I turn to leave, not wishing to face him and feel a firm grip on my shoulders. I spin around and raise my chin in defiance. Glittering eyes meeting glittering eyes. "What is your problem Erestor?" Elrond asks me angrily. I draw myself up to my full height and lift my chin higher. Causing me to look down my nose at Elrond. "Do you really not know My Lord? Or do you just wish not to acknowledge what the problem is?" Elrond looks at me confused. Confused? I snort at this thought. Does he truly not realize?

"I am not looking forward to his slow torturous death, THAT My Lord is the problem." Elrond's eyes open wide and he asks, "Whose death Erestor? Who is dying?" I snort in derision. "Oh come now My Lord, are you truly blind? Are you truly that insensitive?" Elrond continued to look puzzled. This angers me even more. "Have you not thought of the one you claimed to love until yesterday. Do you not realize that even now as we speak, he fades?" I snarl at him. A soft murmured word falls from Elrond's lips, a look of confusion on his face. "Glorfindel?" I sigh loudly. "Very good Elrond! Yes, the one you claimed to love until yesterday. He fades now even as we speak. Are you that dull witted MY LORD?" He looks confused, "But I thought he would understand. We need this alliance. It was a political move."

I snort again. "Yet you found not the need to discuss this with him? You announce it the day before it was to happen and expect him to just say 'ok'? No explanations? You could not warn him in private first? Could not save him the humiliation of having to accept your announcement straight off? To not show any emotion? You my Lord are selfish. Thoughts only on yourself." Elrond had the decency to flush with shame. He looks back up at me, pain in his eyes. "He truly fades?" I roll my eyes. "What did you expect My Lord? For him to cheerfully accept a new love in your life, with no warning? To just throw that love he has held in his heart for you away like that?" I snapped my fingers in his face. "You my Lord, are selfish. You throw away love that has been given, and think not of the consequences. You think not of the two lives that are going to be lost." My eyes open wide at what I just said. A confused frown graces Elrond's face.

"Two lives? How can it be two lives Erestor when it is Glorfindel that is fading." I simply stare at him without answering. Waiting for him to deduce this on his own. His eyes open wide, "You love him." He whispers. "You have loved him all along." He bows his head and places his hands over his face, as I watch on coldly. "What have I done?" I simply turn and walk away. My secret is now out.

Suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
But I can take or leave it if I please

I walk out the doors of the Halls of Fire and make my way down many corridors. As I pass by one of the many openings leading to the courtyard I suddenly stumble. Pain slashes through my chest and I can't help but gasp at the intensity of it. I look sharply out those doors and make for them. I stumble out into the cool night air of spring, my senses leading me I know not where. I make my way deeper into the gardens and realize I am headed in the direction of one of the many bowers there. To Glorfindel's favorite spot. I stumble on, clutching my chest as waves of pain roll over me. I am gasping for air, sweat breaking out on my brow. When I reach the bower another gasp escapes my lips, this time not from the pain, but from what I see.

Glorfindel looked up at my gasp, his eyes glazed. In his right hand he held a bloodied knife. The jeweled dagger the one I had given him a millenia ago. Blood pouring from the slash in his throat. "Glorfindel!" I gasped. I caught him as he fell forward. I gathered him in my arms and picked him up. Cradling him against my chest. Feeling the warm sticky wetness of his blood as it seeped into my formal robes. My heart was fluttering wildly as I carried him to the Halls of Healing.

When I arrived, Glorfindel was taken from my arms and placed on a bed. I watched with horror filled eyes as he was stripped of his robes, the wound at his throat exposed more to my gaze. Tears filled my eyes as they took in the open gash there. Watching as his life's blood drained from him. I blinked as the wound was taken from my gaze as gauze was placed over the wound to staunch the blood flow. I stood there shaking, the pain in my chest starting to throb once more. "Glorfindel." I whispered as tears streamed down my face. Going unnoticed by those scurrying around me.

I noticed out of the corner of my eye one of the Healers running from the room. I hardened myself to what was to come. I turned my attention back to Glorfindel and those who were giving him care. He was pale. Not the pale beauty that was him. Pale from loss of blood. I could see his light fading further, diminishing. I felt another wave of pain hit me and I lowered myself into a seat. I watched as they continued on trying to staunch the flow of blood. Watched as they slowly started failing in their determination. Glorfindel's fading spirit preventing for healing to start. Letting the tears flow freely down my face. I looked up towards the door and I felt anger well up in me. Elrond had arrived. I stood with determination and turned to face him. Watching him take a confused step back when he saw the look on my face.

The game of life is hard to play
I''m gonna loose it anyway
But losing cards are some days late
So this is all I have to say

"What are you doing here?" I growled into Elrond's shocked face. I watched as he drew himself up, his demeanor changing as he spoke to me. "I am Head Healer here. One of my subjects is injured. I have come to do my duty." I hissed at him, poking him in the chest and backing him up against the wall. "One of your subjects? Is that all he is now to you? Just one of your subjects? You speak of duty. You lost your chance at duty when you married Celebrian. I will NOT allow you to touch him. Leave Elrond. You can do no more than the other healers. It is because of YOU that he is here in the first place." I watched him wither under my onslaught. Cringing and pulling into himself. Watched as he turned pain filled eyes to the Balrog-Slayer on the bed. I grabbed him by his chin and roughly turned his face back to me. "Leave Elrond!" I hissed and then released him. I watched him hesitate a moment longer and then with a trembling sigh, he walked from the rooms.

I turned my attention back to what the healers were doing. I watched as a bandage was finally placed over the wound. It finally having stopped bleeding. I watched as blankets were pulled over his body, noticing for the first time that he trembled in the cold. "How is he doing?" I asked one of the healers softly. He glanced back down at the form of Glorfindel and shook his head. "He does not heal. I fear he is fading and there is nothing we can do about it. His sleep is not natural." He looked back up at me with pain filled eyes. "I am sorry Erestor." I sat on the edge of the bed after the healers left and gently stroked his forehead. I gasped at the touch. He felt like ice.

"Glorfindel. I know of your pain. Of your hurt. But please, you can't leave me." I whispered. Tears started to fall from my face. "Please my love, come back. Don't give in to the call of Mandos. Do not leave me." I started to sob. Pain wracking my body as I lay my head upon his chest. Hands gripping tightly to the covers that seperated us. I poured out my heart. My soul. Telling him everything that until now I had kept hidden. I willed all of my love to him. Trying to pull back someone who was fading, not from loss of my love, but of anothers.

I awoke from a reverie I had not known I fell into when I felt a hand touch my shoulder gently. I glanced up and I felt myself stiffen. My face turning into a sneer once again. Elrond looked down at me with saddened eyes. I quickly stood and watched him take a few steps back under the onslaught of my gaze. "I thought I told you, you were not needed or wanted here Elrond!" I hissed at him through clenched teeth. He held his hands out in front of him, palms up on supplication. "Peace Erestor. I will leave in a moment. I came to tell you that there is a chance. It is a slim one, but still a chance." I narrowed my eyes in suspicion. "What do you say Elrond? Speak!" Elrond flinched visibly from the venom dripping in my voice.

Suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
But I can take or leave it if I please

"I know he fades from what I have done. But there is a small chance to bring him back from it. You say that you will fade with him because you love him." I nod my head impatiently, waiting for him to continue. "Bind yourself to him Erestor." I gasped in shock at what he suggested. He sighed and started pacing the room. "You say you will fade anyway. But if you bind yourself to him, there is a small chance..." He left the words hanging in the air. I looked down at Glorfindel. I listened as Elrond continued. "I cannot guarantee that he will accept the binding. If he does not, he will fade. He is fading already and you with him. So if he denies it, then nothing will have changed for either of you. But if he does accept it..." Once again he left the words hanging. "You have always been his best friend Erestor. There is but a small hope in this, but it is still a hope. He may accept because of your friendship." Elrond finished softly.

I barely noticed Elrond leave. Closing the door behind him, leaving us alone. I continued to stare down at Glorfindel. A small spark of hope taking up residence in my chest. Was there a chance? Would Glorfindel accept me? Could I pull him back from Mandos' grasp? Glorfindel was fading. I with him. If he denied it, if he came not to accept it, we would be in the same predicament anyway. What would be the harm in trying? The sigh that was expelled from my lungs had a tremble to it.

I once again sat down. This time in a chair next to the bed. I took his cold, limp hand in mine. I brought it up to my face and softly brushed my lips against the knuckles. Tears spilled from my eyes once more. Drops spattering lightly on his hand. It was a small chance. A very small one. Would he accept my love, especially so soon after having his heart ripped to shreds by the selfishness of Lord Elrond? Would he accept the offer of binding just to be brought back? Or would he in turn love me as I love him? What if he accepted the bond and left my love unrequited? Could I accept that? I drew in a determined breath.

The sword of time will pierce our skin
It doesn''t hurt when it begins
But as it works it''s way on in
The pain grows stronger watch it grin

I looked around and realized that there was a jeweled mithril dagger sitting on the bed stand. It had not been there moments ago. Elrond must have left it. With wide eyes I picked it up and weighed it in my hand. It was light and had a jewel encrusted hilt. Its blade deadly sharp. My hands trembled as I looked from dagger to Glorfindel and back again. I felt my lips thin into a line of grim determination.

"Glorindel, I know you do not reach the Halls of Mandos yet. I know that you can hear me, so listen to what I have to say my love." I whispered into his ear. "I know you are in pain. You have been betrayed. You fade and with your fading, you will take me with you. For I love you Glorfindel. I know that you love another and I have ever accepted this. But I ask that you accept my love now Glorfindel. Come back to us, come back to me." I watched as a tear fell from my eye and landed on his cheek. "Accept my love Glorfindel. For I will never betray that love. Ever will you reside in my heart. Please my love, come back to me. Give me a chance to love you."

I gently lay a kiss upon his cold lips. Looking down at the pale face, I gently caressed the hair back from his forehead. Whispering murmurs of love into his ears. Making promises. Pleading. Begging. Asking for his acceptance. Asking for his trust. Asking for him to return to me. To give me a chance. Slowly I crawled onto the bed and straddled his hips. Determination filling me.

I took his left hand in mine and gently turned it over. I lifted it to my lips and kissed it. I then brought the jeweled dagger's point to it and quickly nicked it. I saw blood well up from it and gently lay it upon my thigh. I brought the dagger to my own right palm and did the same. I watched in morbid fascination as blood welled up from my own palm. I picked up Glorfindel's hand once more and interlaced my fingers with his. Bringing the cuts of our palms together. Allowing our blood to mingle. I felt a burning pain fill my hand and travel up my arm to fill my whole body. A bright light flashed and I felt myself fall forward on top of Glorfindel.

Suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
But I can take or leave it if I please

I was walking through a brightly lit fog. I could hear my footsteps echoing. I knew not where I was. I continued to walk, soon hearing the sound of weeping. I made my way towards the sound and soon the fog started to slowly lift. I was in a white hall of some sort and before me sitting on the ground, hands covering his face was Glorfindel. I started to make my way towards him, suddenly being stopped by a hand on my shoulder. I turned and gasped. Before me stood a beautiful vision. An elf. His hair was blackest black, and his eyes were violet. He had a radiant smile on his face, he was dressed in robes of white. His long black hair reached to his knees.

"You have come to claim Glorfindel from my Halls." The vision before me stated. Mandos! I stared at him in awe. He waited patiently for me to acknowledge that he had spoken. I drew myself up and lifted my chin in pride and defiance. "I have My Lord. I have come to claim his soul." Mandos inclined his head and asked, "Do you deserve it?" He asked me softly. I bowed my head. "I know not if I deserve it My Lord. I only know that I love him. And that if it is denied me, I will be coming to meet you once again, for I will fade with him." Mandos lifted his hand and gently caressed my face. I felt peace wash through me at his touch.

"It is for him to decide." With these words spoken, he gestured towards Glorfindel who was still sitting upon the cold marble floor weeping. I slowly made my way to him and knelt down in front of him. Azure blue eyes filled with anguish looked up at me. Widening in startlement. "Erestor?" He caressed my face, confusion written across his features. "Erestor? What are you doing here?" His eyes clearing from pain, filling with curiosity. "I have come to bring you back." I said gently. Softly. I in turn caressed his features and watched as his eyes closed in pain. When he opened them, they were once again filled with tears.

"I cannot. I wish to fade. Elrond has betrayed me and I have no reason to return." He whispered to me. I continued to caress his face, my fingers ghosting lightly over his features. "If you give me but a small chance Glorfindel, I will be your reason to return. I have willingly bound myself to you. I have loved you long and do not willingly give you up. If you choose to stay then so be it. But, I will stay with you." Glorfindel's eyes opened wide at my statement. "But why Erestor?" He asked softly. I smiled gently down at him and said just as softly, "Because I love you Glorfindel. For myself I need no other reason." I leaned down and gently claimed his lips with mine. At his surprised gasp, I slowly plunged my tongue into his mouth. Savoring the taste of him. I pulled back and whispered against his lips, "Come back to me Glorfindel. Let me love you." And I deepened the kiss again.

A brave man once requested me
To answer questions that I keep
"is it to be or not to be"
And I reply "oh why ask me ? "

I groaned, my body sore. I felt like I had been in a battle with Orcs. I groaned again and pushed myself up from where I lay. I gasped as I looked down, memories flooding through me. I was sitting astride Glorfindel's hips, my right hand entertwined with his left. My body still tingling with the blood bond I had created. Tears filled my eyes and I closed them, letting them fall freely. I had failed. I wept openly, my hand still entertwined with his. I had failed. I had lost him and now I would fade as well. The thought of slowly fading was daunting. Now I knew why Glorfindel chose the path he chose. I tightened my left hand over the hilt of the dagger that was still within my grasp. I brought it up to my throat, tears continuing to stream down my face. "I love you Glorfindel. I shall see you within the Halls of Mandos soon my love." I tightened my grip.

"Erestor?"

My eyes flew open and met with azure blue. "Glorfindel?" I whispered unbelievingly. His hand came up and gently pulled the dagger from my grasp. I continued to stare into those azure orbs. Feeling as if I was drowning. I trembled as he lifted his hand up once more and gently caressed my face. My eyes fluttered closed at the softness, the gentleness of the touch. I felt as his thumb gently caressed away the tears that once again started flowing. Moving to caress my lips. Lips that parted under the pressure, my tongue darting out to taste my own tears. I opened my eyes once again to look down into a face full of wonder. "You came to the Halls of Mandos to claim me." Glorfindel whispered. "Why?"

"Because I love you." I said simply and lowered myself. Our lips came together gently in a chaste kiss. I knew he was still weak, but could not help myself. I slowly used my tongue to gently caress the line that seperated lips and felt his lips part. Inviting me into the recesses of his mouth. 'Ai, sweet nectar.' I gently dipped my tongue inside his sweet honeyed mouth, tasting him. His tongue came up to tentatively meet mine and dueled with it. I could not help myself and I deepened the kiss. A moan escaping my lips at his sweet taste. I heard a moan answer in return. I felt as hands caressed up my back and move to entangle into my hair. I felt their grip tighten and deepened the kiss even further. Ecstasy rolling through me in waves. I broke the kiss with a gasp and looked down at Glorfindel with wide eyes. His eyes meeting mine, just as wide. "Glorfindel." I whispered softly once again. He pulled me down to him once again, words whispered against my lips. Words that made my heart soar. "Claim me Erestor. Take me and make me yours."

Suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
But I can take or leave it if I please

Another moan escaped my lips at his words and I claimed his lips once more. I felt his hands move down to my robes and was forced to break the kiss once more. Impatiently I sat up, pulling the robes and then my tunic up over my head, letting them fall to the floor next to the bed. I claimed his lips once more, heated passion guiding my moves. With a growl I stood upon the bed. Standing with slippered feet on either side of my lover's hips and quickly undid the lacings to my leggings. I quickly removed them, kicking them off the bed also. Along with my slippers. I settled myself back onto Glorfindel and as I claimed his lips, I rolled my hips, bringing our heat together. I relished the twin gasps that escaped from both of our lips, to be captured within our kiss.

I moved my lips to his shoulder, avoiding the still healing wound on his neck and I nipped gently. Glorfindel arched up into me with a soft cry. I slowly licked down to his chest and took a budded nipple into my mouth. Laving it with licks and nips. I felt his hands tighten into my hair as he arched into me once again. I moved slowly to his other nipple and lavished it with the same attention as its twin. I could not wait. I moved down further, licking down the planes of his taught stomach, muscles twitching below my questing tongue. I dipped my tongue into his navel and paid homage to it. Glorfindel squirming beneath me. "Saes, Erestor. Saes!" The cry nectar to my ears. I moved lower and to the left, nipping at the indention of where hip met thigh. Placing my arm across his abdomen as he tried to come up off the bed.

"I am freshly returned from the Halls of Mandos again Erestor, and you threaten to send me back once more, for you are surely killing me." He gasped. I smiled against heated skin and then bit softly. Another cry graced my ears. I moved to his other hip and continued to tease him. I gently parted his thighs and moved to lavish kisses on the insides. Biting and leaving marks behind. Glorfindel thrashing wantonly beneath me. Elvish curses meeting my ears. "Erestor! Please!" He demanded. I gave in and with one swallow, took him fully into my mouth. He arched up and spilt his seed immediately down my throat. I continued to lap at him as I felt his member slowly go lax. I kissed my way back up his body and kissed him deeply, letting him taste himself upon my lips.

And you can do the same thing if you please

I quickly got up and made my way over to a cabinet. In it I found what I was looking for. I made my way back to my lover who was still flushed. I lay next to him, half over him and kissed him deeply once more. My thumb flicked the top of the vial I held and the sweet smell of Athelas filled our nostrils. I dipped a finger inside, coating it heavily and then rubbed fingers together to slick more. As I kissed him deeply once again, my hand snaked down slowly and found his opening. I lazily massaged, teasing him. Already he grew hard once more. "Please." I heard whispered. As I claimed his mouth once again, I slowly slid the digit inside. Breaking past the tight ring of muscle. I stopped at the hiss I heard and patiently waited for him to adjust. When I felt a tentative push of his hips, I slip into him completely. I immediately hooked a finger and found what I sought. Glorfindel yelped, eyes opening wide as I stroked him.

As soon as I had him writhing upon the single finger, I slowly pulled it out and pushed back in while adding a second. I repeated the process, my leg that lay over his keeping him pinned down as he bucked and arched against me. Soon I added a third and slowly stretched him in preperation of what was to come. I brought him close to the brink over and over. Holding him there for a long time, before denying him and pulling him back. He moaned in protest, he moaned with desire. His pleas for release, singing in my ears. I finally took pity on him.

I moved above him and kissed him deeply. I then pulled back and settled between his legs. I slowly moved his legs up so that they were settled over my shoulders. Opening him to me. Exposing him to me. I placed my heat at his entrance and looked into his eyes. Eyes filled with desire. With his nod, I slowly pushed into the sweet heat of my love. Sheathing myself slowly but fully with one stroke. Biting my lip, I held myself there on the brink, waiting for him to adjust. I gasped when he suddenly pushed up against me. Silent demands to take him. I slowly started to stroke in and out. The pace increasing with each thrust of his hips that came up to meet me. Our eyes never leaving one anothers. Our moans mingled together to become one, just as our bodies were so joined. I placed my hand between our bodies and stroked my lover. My name was screamed from his lips as I felt his hot essence spill over my hand. I followed crying Glorfindel's name as I spilled deep inside his tight velvet heat.

We lay trembling in each others arms. Breath coming in short pants. I lifted my head that had been cradled on his chest and looked into satisfied but tired eyes. My heart soared at his words. "I love you Erestor." I smiled down at him and claimed his lips once more. "And I love you Glorfindel." I whispered against his lips. I slowly pulled from him and lay upon my back, pulling him onto his side against me, wrapping my arms around his still trembling frame. "Thank you." He whispered as he fell into reverie. I answered with a simple kiss upon his golden head.

My eyes glittered as I looked at the head that popped in the door. A look of relieved pain filled the gray eyes of the Lord of Imladris as he lay his eyes on us. Glorfindel curled and sleeping peacefully at my side. My arm protectively wrapped around him. His eyes met mine and he simply bowed his head, trying to hide unshed tears before he closed the door softly once again. I tightened my grip on Glorfindel, placed another kiss gently on his head and followed him into reverie. A smile upon my lips.

end

Saes=please